The first five days of January have been spent almost entirely in bed. I have been suffering from migraines, digestive issues, and an ear infection. I feel like a mess. The first day of the year was the hardest. I was ready to take on the world. I had big plans. I mean, it’s all about new, right? I have stuff to do. Instead, I laid in bed with the covers over my head hiding from sound and light. My little son curled up next to me and spent the day quietly watching Netflix on his Ipad. The maternal guilt was awful.
The next day wasn’t much better. By day three I gave up and went to the chiropractor. She did her best and told me I was totally locked up. My entire neck and back muscles were knotted tight. She sent me to get a massage. I was hoping that would help. Again, I was told the same thing. It did help a little but didn’t fix me. The next day I could see again and eat.
Then came digestive issues…and sore throat and ear ache. Want to get really personal; I even threw off my monthly cycle. I am rarely sick, so a whole week of being sick is kicking my butt. I went to the doctor this morning and the conclusion is that I have stressed myself to the point of being sick. The prescription: stress less. Ha!
Ok, as if it were just that easy. So on the drive home I started to think about what I’m stressing about. Other than trying to take over the world I can’t possibly imagine what would have me so stressed. Just this morning I read something about cutting things out of your life and giving yourself (and others) some slack. So I started thinking about how I could apply this to myself and my situation.
I made the decision to say no to an art exhibit that I’m stressing about. Fortunately I sold 15 paintings last month, which left me too short to hang the kind of show I want to without having more time. Then I started thinking about everything I’m hoping to accomplish in the next year. Except I haven’t really given myself a year. I have given myself about a month. You know, no pressure super woman. My expectations for myself are absolutely unrealistic. I don’t know how not to try to do it all at once and get immediate results. However, my body is telling me I better learn.
Within 30 minutes of completely letting go of my time line and actually giving myself permission to not make any decisions for the next month, my system is starting to work again. Funny how my mind decides to shut my body down and vice versa.
So, I am giving myself permission to cut myself some slack. Things will happen, and it doesn’t need to happen right now. I too give you permission to just breathe. After all, all good things take a little time.